The man haters club. I know women in this group, and I am told often of their membership affiliation. “I’m the President of the man haters club.” Do I need to know that? Being a man, I wonder why this is acceptable.
I don’t recall the last time it was acceptable to say to a black person, “I am the President of the black haters club” or to a a woman, “No offense, but I hate all women.” I dare you to try and get away saying, “I hate gays.” These things don’t happen without recourse. These statements are seen as racist, sexist or just plain hate-speech.
Help me to understand this, then. Why is it acceptable to make comments about hating men? “All men are pigs.” “All men are cheaters and liars.” “I will never trust a man.” “I am the president of the man haters club.”
Do you know what happens if a man stands up for himself? Is he applauded for his ability to rise up in the face of adversity and the onslaught of criticism? Is he praised for using his voice to represent men everywhere? No. He is told that he is proving an ingrained belief pattern of male supremacy, or that he is proving that he his male privilege. Really?
I was told earlier this year that by an openly gay man that employers should get to the place where they are able to explain to potential candidates that their beliefs don’t fit the mold and they should look elsewhere. What beliefs? Christian beliefs. Biblically founded beliefs. He wanted to be heard, respected and listened to. Me, I couldn’t speak openly because I was being intolerant. He has his beliefs, I have my beliefs. His are right, mine are wrong. Interesting. I would like to say mine are right and his are wrong, but, once again, I would be considered intolerant and subject to further criticism.
I said to this man, whether anyone is black or white, straight or gay, Muslim or Christian, I really don’t care because we are all people. I asked what the problem was with this approach. He told me that I wasn’t appreciative of the plight of the gay culture. Seriously?
So I called a gay colleague, who is well aware of my beliefs and values, and I of his. We have talked many times, shared many laughs and talked about our respective families. I explained my thoughts of this past conversation and he assured me that despite our differences of which there are many, mutual respect rises above the differences.
Everyone has a story. I wish we could all be open and respectful of our differences.